Newcastle Relegation Prompts Toon to Feature on Life of Brian 2

Newcastle is expected to be surprise location for any sequel to the controversial 1970's Monty Python Hit: Life of Brian.

The surprise selection of the Toon over Jerusalem has occured due to the dramatic rise in alleged Messiah's in the Newcastle area, sparked by comments that Alan Shearer is not the Messiah - he's just a TV pundit.

Having only recently grappled with the realisation that Kevin Keegan was not the Messiah (on two counts!) and now having found Shearer to now also NOT be the Messiah, thousands of Geordies are running around Newcastle grasping at straws to comfort their relegation and abject failure.

Meanwhile, psychologists are considering whether or not to rename Jerusalem Syndrome as Geordie Syndrome.

However, even the most desperate Geordies agreed that Joey Barton was not the Messiah but was a very naughty boy.